Final people logos with patterns. Overview.
I invited a few of my peers to give a critique on this assignment. It will be in a form of a comment to this post.
I told them that this was purely an exercise in geometry - less about the concepts - form and not function. The restraints were one color plus black and futura. The deliverables here are 1) the mark with type and 2) a pattern using the logo.
I asked them to be honest and as constructive as possible.
Enjoy.
1) Jason Raville (Missing a final logo submission)
2) Kevin Fenton
3) Shane Dobes (Missing a final logo submission)
4) Caroline Howards
5) Mike Kelly (Missing a final logo submission)
6) Andrea
7) Lauren Jung
8: Ben Jackson
9) Hadi Seyfi
10) Meggan Wood
11) W
1. a nice clean, simple pattern but i would like to see the logo.
2. the pattern shifts, which really distracts me, but i like the logo on its own much more.
3. i think i see where this is headed, but it gets muddled with not enough negative space. i like the idea of a pattern based on less structure.
4. the foreground/ background element works better in the logo than the pattern, it is confusing in the pattern.
5. there is a lot of energy in this pattern and it really works well, but i lose the pattern in this color when i step back to view the pattern on a whole.
6. the pattern creates a strong 90º axis as well as a 45º. i feel the logo loses that structure on its own.
7. i wish this pattern spiraled continually inward rather than simply concentric circles of the logo. as a logo it has nice energy.
8. this is a really iconic logo and the pattern forms a nice diagonal rhythm as well as
90º grid.
9. i wish the negative space in the pattern formed the logo so there was some
interaction there. im not seeing enough of the pattern to realize it fully though.
10. the negative space in the logo is nice and the implied boundaries i like, but i dont think they are utilized enough in pattern. but the pattern is really strong and seems grounded.
11. i really like the negative area that could be filled with a larger logo. the space in-between the larger seems a little forced though.
final logo submission: http://www.flickr.com/photos/22847191@N07/2242021638/
Lauren, your pieces are wonderful. Your use of perspective makes all the difference in bringing the pattern to life. Great job.
Kevin, I also very much appreciate your effort. There’s still some inconsistencies in the pattern, but with some tightening I think it could become very compelling.
I’d encourage everyone else to add some life to their pattern, maybe with change in scale (ala Hadi’s “dick”
or even using negative space to heighten the emotive qualities of the piece (ala W’s “god” star)– but even with those, there’s still some work that remains in adding some energy to the pattern.
I think of things as in purpose and goals. So, when I was asked to give feedback on these logos and patterns, I have to explain that I don’t really care for form, only feelings. Why did you make these? Was it because you got an assignment? Assignment for what? Are you learning or playing? In your goal of becoming a graphic designer or artist? Form isn’t very interesting, only the message is. Then we use form to make that message into something ugly or attractive. Depending on trends, ugly could work best. Sometimes what is beautiful works best. It depends… So when I see political or philosophical logos like bombs, penises or God. It seems like your logos and patterns would fit a not-much-profit-given company that wouldn’t make your carrier as a graphic designer, but maybe an artist? And to sustain as an artist in this world, you need to get so damn good it’s creepy! That is, if you want to earn money. But this is training, right? And it’s not easy making a good logo and form without any ideas on what it’s for.
Here’s some random spontaneous feelings about the stuff on this page.
Jason Raville; hypnotic but constrained.
Kevin Fenton; Armchair media /Stefan Kjartansson must have been to inspiring or controlling.
Caroline Howards; love it.
Mike Kelly; too sticky and tight.
Andrea; goodio… Death to Cheney – makes me feel happy I can feel hatred.
Lauren Jung; your on to something. A few less triangles would make it better (I think).
Ben Jackson; what if those bombs turned to drops?
Hadi Seyfi; first bombs are dropped, then penises. It’s a man dominant warrior world, so why not?
Meggan Wood; political stone wall.
Aaah.. I don’t know Stefan! I don’t know the context to this! You say that it’s only forms, but it’s not. They are messages! And I don’t think someone wants my point of view when it comes to form. I’m like a child, that’s what makes me good. I can bend boundaries and rules the world puts there. There’s things about design that can be learned, like mathematically. And maybe some of that stuff is needed here, like the placement of the text next to the forms. If that is a lesson like that, then I’m off with this feedback.
Well, good luck with everything! Take care.
So I’ve been following this blog for awhile and I’m really impressed at how far everyone has come along with their designs. And I’m blown away at your deep respect for penises. Fantastic!
1) Jason Raville
It’s a bummer you’re limited to one color in the pattern because I think even being able to shift the gray a bit would be perfect for making this pattern really work. At this point though it feels like it needs some type of separation to make it pop more.. a color modification would definitely do the trick, but if you’re stuck with one color.. then blame Stefan. Visually it’s nice, but I think it just needs something a bit more to push it over the top and make the pattern more distinctive. Like.. if the top circle pointy thing was a bit larger and not so similar in size as the other two circles.. that contrast might help.
2) Kevin Fenton
I like the icon by itself.. How it works with the type I’m not sold on yet.. I would suggest playing the “Show me 100 variations” game.. That usually does the trick.. Over the course of a week though.. not in one day..
The pattern makes sense with brittany.. because it’s like a thunderstorm or something.. you can just see lives being ripped apart in the chaos of it. It’s also kinda like tires tracks.. Optically it’s pretty neat.. I could stare at this for hours.. like Magic Eye style.
3) Shane
Shane WTF?! This isn’t graffiti explosion class man! This reminds me of last night when the Patriots pissed away a perfect season because they didn’t show up to play. Let’s make sure that’s not the case here as well Mr. Dobes. Don’t pull a Brady on me..
4) Caroline Howards
Yah.. I totally got caught staring at this pattern for way too long thinking “Is this a pattern, I think she broke it” But in fact it IS a pattern and you get points because it looks like a pain in the ass. The relationship with the icon to the type doesn’t work for me. It’s just not balanced right, the icon is overpowering the type and they’re not playing nice together. Maybe doing a ton of variations and then printing them out, putting them on a wall.. and staring at a distance would be a good thing. The icon itself could perhaps also be strengthened if it was ‘tightened up’ more.. if the elements came in a little closer.. I’m not sold on that rogue pacman in the right corner either.. He could turn on God and screw up the trinity at some point. However the pattern is amazing so your 5 million points from that clearly overshadows any icon deficiencies.
5) Mike Kelly
Ziggy Stardust? Ocean Star People? You tell me Mike.. You teeeeell meeeee…
Pretty pattern.. the star people will thank you.
6) Andrea
Penise Power up in here!
I really like the icon.. it’s so… ICONIC! Probably the best icon I’ve seen I think.. it’s smart and simple and can be reproduced easily in lots of sizes.. The pattern is jacked up though.. see how it’s making those optical white horizontal lines? If you fix that, it’ll be Grade A Beefcake. LOVE the all caps type treatment too.. Good good good.
7) Lauren Jung
Lauren you were one of the few that read the brief and realized you could use another color.. NICE! Although I’m not sure why you didn’t use it in the patterns?
I’m eating a bagel right now and I’m almost spit it out because I got motion sick staring at your patterns. Straight up NASA!
I love them Lauren. Good explo on that.
I think though in regards to the icon and type, that the icon again is overpowering the type.. maybe scale it down a bit and should be ready for battle.
Solid.
Ben Jackson is not to be messed with.
9) Hadi Seyfi
Haha, I love the George Bush blue.. and the all caps type.. It helps to amplify what a penise that guy is. At first I don’t like the icon positioning with the type.. but then again.. it kinda works? But you’d have to have a strict usage guide to make it work well in every situation.. which would be a lot of work and suck to do.. :-/
I don’t really get the pattern.. It’s like “I’m a pattern, but not really…”
10) Meggan Wood
Solid pattern, the icon/type treatment.. I dunno.. I have my doubts about it being workable in actual situations. God is going to get kinda small sometimes.. but maybe with the bold weight and all caps.. it doesn’t matter? This would be a fun one to see in various situations.. letterhead, business cards.. signage.. pope mobiles..
11) W
As with a lot of these, again I feel the icon is too dominant to the type. The pattern is similar to Heyfi’s in the sense that it feels like I can’t see enough to really get a good feel for the pattern. Zoom out on that sunshine
Again, everyone you have come really far and are definitely on the right track. Keep working really hard and if you don’t like anything I said, remember.. BLAME STEFAN!
1. Why no logo? When I went to school, if we missed a deadline, we got an F. No matter what. I think the only thing that could have gotten us out of it is a natural disaster that destroyed the school or the teacher died. There are no missed deadlines in the real world is what I learned later in life. The client will miss all their deadlines, you can not.
2. Brittany. I am guessing this is Spears? I don’t really understand it. I see a butterfly made out of B’s. I don’t really get what the logo is trying to say. It does not communicate to me.
3. See #1.
4. This is the best logo of the lot by far. It takes in account for form, negative space, construction. I would like to see the type rocked. I really appreciate the insight into the 3 element and how one doesn’t always work. It
5. See #3.
6. This is a very simplistic view. Doesn’t seem to have any thought put into it. A good logo shows insight and interest into facts and forms that help communicate.
7. I don’t know who this is for sure? Bill Richardson? I like the movement. Great that you took a simple icon and rocked it. Great stuff. The pattern is not the best looking, but like the idea. Good job.
8. See #6, but a tad better.
9. See above x1000. I am ashamed to even comment. I would fail this logo for sure.
10. I don’t really understand what this says, it does not communicate but the form is nice. I would try to focus on what this says, pulling things out to help the viewer what this says. The pattern is nicely constructed.
11. I would say this is the second best. Nice use of shape and form. Also nice that you didn’t just fill the full page with one icon, you constructed with it. Great job. Good idea, not great but good enough for a student for sure!!! A work.
#8 actually has a nice pattern, forgot to mention that. Good work, simple idea.
Looking over these it was tough to not think about the function and only concentrate on form but I did my best. Also, I wrote more for some than others because I’m at work and am tired. Sorry.
You should probably get some feedback from a kindergardener to see what he thinks is pretty. Also, find a random person at the mall and do the same.
1) Jason
the mark you seem to want it to be completely balanced by making the type dark and then negating the thing that stands out with a lighter grey. it’d a bit unclear if the mark is supposed to add the accent and then a little something extra or what.
pattern - a little horizontal feeling, maybe look at lining things up on the diag or spacing better for the vert maybe a little dull, but maybe not, like a steady beat.
2) Kevin
All of these mark placements right above certain letters. It’s okay, just hope it makes sense with what you are trying to do. The mark’s form is okay. Does the bigger round part on the little B match to the little round part to the bigger B?
The pattern isn’t working for me. Needs more spacing if you are going to do something like that.
3) Shane
Splatter. More white space. Add some flourishes and make it a crest.
4) Caroline
I dont like the white space between the G and the pacman mouth. Its odd with so many rounded forms. And the sizing is odd. Though, I like the circles and triangles.
The pattern is cool. I can see that being used on a bowling ball bag.
5) Mike
Pattern is okay. Nice.
6) Andrea
Mark placement works for me. A bit large. Or maybe a bit too small.
Pattern is nice, I like wrought iron though.
7) Lauren
With so many triangles as a mark they might as well be touching. Though if you are going to put a space between them, I almost feel like it the big one should start out with a horizontal edge at the in-between white line edge.
The white areas really stick out with the mark. I guess it makes sense to do a fractal inspired pattern for a fractal inspired mark… the shapes are too pointy for something really nice though. Maybe a quick transition from big to small would be nice. Maybe.
Mark placement seems good. lowercase seems good. The red shape placement might be a little odd - is that centered in the white space? The mark is alright, though not very unique.
The pattern is contrasty. Good or bad up to you. This might/would be racist to do, but it could work as one of those head scarves Saudi’s wear: http://a.abcnews.com/images/International/a0d115dd-9e72-40e6-9050-57e920261e63_ms.jpeg
9) Hadi
I think the placement works well with the strong message. It is not a time to be subtle. Ball to shaft proportion seems spot on.
The pattern, is not a pattern? Maybe it is. But I don’t think its working out. A penis that big should be bleeding… off the page.
10) Meggan
The mark, sure why not.
The pattern is nice.
11) W
The mark near the type seems too enormous. Make it smaller.
I like the holes in the pattern, though it creates a very sharp shape that contradicts the mark by itself. Like barbed-wire. I like the four leaf flower much more.
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